Chopped Bible Salad #2: Personal Promise Bible

chopped salad

As the old saying goes, ” you are unique, just like everybody else.”  Well, that is until you get your hands on the Personal Promise Bible.

 Through the power of modern technology, you can now order a Bible that no longer has the boring impersonality of the original text.  Instead, you can read your very own name over 5,000 times in the entire Old and New Testaments.  There is no doubt, then, that these promises are for you, because now from the lips of God you can hear your name as it should have been shouted throughout the ages.

Once again the developers of this software and hardware have once again taken the book that is considered to be inerrant and dramatically taken license with the text.  Many Christian leaders have continued to debate about the personal level of the Scriptures as well as the personal nature of the relationship that God has with humanity.  This blatant misuse of the Bible puts a completely different appearance on this issue, in essence eliminating the entire debate.

There is also the translation issue where two different words in Greek can be translated into the English word “you.”  This is an issue that relates to the corporate communication of the Bible in contrast to its message to us as individuals.  When taking each occurrence of the English word “you” and replacing it with a person’s first name, it eliminates much of what is said to the body of believers as a whole and in an inferior way makes it the responsibility not of the church but of the individual.

What the Personal Promise Bible gives us is a wholly holey Bible because it has had about 5,000 bullet piercings where any name can be inserted.  Just one more inheritance of the marriage of Christianity and capitalism.

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About Aaron Gardner

Aaron is a counselor and student of the Bible, passionate about sharing the good news of Jesus Christ. He lives in central Indiana with his wife, one-year-old son and their two dogs. View all posts by Aaron Gardner

2 responses to “Chopped Bible Salad #2: Personal Promise Bible

  • Saskia

    Inerrant? You might want to sit in on my Biblescience class and learn why the stories in the Bible are in there, how the Bible developed, what kind of powerplays went in to that, and why things were written the way they were. It gives a whole new meaning to inerrant.

    But I agree with you all the way on the personalized bible thing. For a minute there, I was afraid you could do a Thomas Jefferson on the Bible and pick which pieces you wanted in there.

  • Aaron

    Yeah, I have been in those classes, and I know exactly what you are talking about 😉

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